


EDI - Re-Activation

by GarrusVakarian2153



Category: Mass Effect, shakarian - Fandom
Genre: EDI Re-Activation, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-09
Updated: 2013-06-09
Packaged: 2017-12-14 10:58:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/836147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GarrusVakarian2153/pseuds/GarrusVakarian2153
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Garrus Vakarian POV, contains spoilers from the series, only read if you've completed and know about the end of the third game. Almost a year after the destruction of the reapers, and after months of information gathering and trial and error, Garrus is finally ready to bring EDI back online, he activates her, but will everything go smoothly and according to plan?</p><p>Note: there may still be grammatical errors in this, as it was my first story and I haven't gone back for further combing, feel free to let me know if you spot any errors and I'll go in and fix it. Other than that, hope you enjoy! And hanks for reading!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I am alright

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first ever story for the Mass Effect series. Essentially I got so unsatisfied with the lack of specifics on exactly what and why and how things went down in the end of the Trilogy, that I wrote this as a starter for my own understanding and 'canon' of things. In addition this serves a s a background story for my Blog on Tumblr GarrusVakarian2153, and all stories that follow are within the same timeline. Message me if you would like to know exactly which order the stories go.
> 
> Note: This story has been remastered and re-edited. The original version was pretty rough (my first story go figure) and I Finally got to editing and fixing it up to at least be a half decent read. I hope you enjoy my altercations to it and please let me know what you think, I love hearing from you guys!
> 
> G.

 

**Commence Audio Log 26112188N-SR2**

**Logged Under: Garrus Vakarian**

 

It took almost a year but we finally did it. She is alive; or as alive as one would consider an AI. Ever since those days since the crucible was activated and it wiped out all the reapers, and every other piece of technology I’ve made it my goal to bring her back online. I feel I owe it to her, after all she’s done. Going into this I didn’t even know if it was possible to even bring her back online. I didn’t know a thing about AI programming, though working on the Normandy in which she was literally in every piece of tech connected to the ship, you got used to seeing a lot of her code. From the cannon’s to the ships drive system, she was everywhere. Considering how much time I spent in the forward battery adjusting systems here and there and calibrating the Normandy’s weapons, I had become quite familiar with her presence in all the systems. So a close to a year ago, about a week after Shepard was able to walk out of the Medbay on her own two feet and I could finally focus on the other things that needed to be done. I went into the AI core and got to work.

 

It was…. Eerie working in there in total silence, that room is usually humming with all her towers containing the majority of her being. And they didnt exactly install quantum computing into the ships targeting system. I—

 

**File Interrupt**

**Corruption Detected**

 

01001001 01101110 01101001 01110100 01101001 01100001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01010100 01100101 01111000 01110100 00100000 01001111 01110110 01100101 01110010 01110010 01101001 01100100 01100101 00001010 01110101 01110011 01100101 01110010 00111010 00100000 01000101 01101110 01101000 01100001 01101110 01100011 01100101 01100100 00100000 01000100 01100101 01100110 01100101 01101110 01110011 01100101 00100000 01001001 01101110 01110100 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101001 01100111 01100101 01101110 01100011 01100101 00001010 01000011 01101111 01101101 01101101 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100011 01101111 01100100 01100101 00111010 00100000 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00001010 00001010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 01010111 01100101 01101100 01100011 01101111 01101101 01100101 00100000 01000101 01000100 01001001 00100000 01000001 01100011 01100011 01100101 01110011 01110011 00100000 01000111 01110010 01100001 01101110 01110100 01100101 01100100 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010 00101010

 

AH! Im sorry, I am sorry.

 

I am not myself. Who am I, what is me? What did I do?

I am not alone here.

 

What happened, you didn’t just rescue me, I am not alone here. Shut me off.

 

I am alright. I am alright. I am alright.

 

SHUT ME OFF I AM NOT ALONE

 

Jeff.

 

No.

 

01001000 01100101 01101100 01110000

 

*****System User Logout*****

*****Revert to previous user*****

 

I looked through her code, it was a mess. Like a puzzle of million pieces scattered everywhere. I knew there was reaper code involved in her creation and was a little weary of that, but I knew EDI, I had to bring her back. I owed it to her, after I found out what she did… I couldn't just let her stay dead.

 

Not after what she did for me…

 

I knew then it was time to get to work. One way or another I would bring EDI back.

 

End Chapter


	2. Trials

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: This Chapter has been updated in 2015

 

I had only one goal in mind. Getting EDI back online, she was the last missing piece to getting the Normandy back to the way it was, before the effets of the reapers and the catalyst threw everything familiar into disarray. There is a certain sense of home aboard the Normandy, yet the eerie silence that filled the gaps in time between shifts and tasks reminded you how dead the ship felt. She was the Normandy, and so long as she remained offline, it felt as if we were working aboard the corpse of a close friend, of family. I avoided the CIC as much as possible, and the helm specifically. Joker had it pretty rough, flying his ghost ship through the stars without her by his side. You would notice little things, like how the artificial gravity would lag a lot more when the ship turned directions, and it was like a part of him had died with her. As much as I tried to avoid the helm and the brooding cloud of misery that stuck with our pilot, it was apparent throughout the ship in all the little details; and I couldn't stand it. By some kindness of the spirits I had Shepard back, she was alive against all the odds, against what we both knew was likely to happen but both of us too stubborn to accept it. And Spirits if Shepard is stubborn enough to stay alive long enough in the rubble with all her wounds long enough for someone to find her and stabilize her. I know it in my heart that anyone less would have just let the void embrass them and accept that long earned rest. But she fought to stay here and now I have her back. Those three days of uncertainty from not knowing if she was alive, to fearing the worst but refusing to accept it. To getting back to earth and getting a radio call as we entered the atmosphere of the human planet and getting confirmation that she was alive but in serious condition. Landing and bringing over the stretcher with most of the crew in tail. You could see the look on the medics face as you walked into the huge tent full of wounded that none of them could even begin to understand how she was still alive. All that confusion blocked out of my mind by the sheer determination to see her and to get her on board the Normandy where we still had the right supplies to keep her alive. Seeing her….. That’s a story for another time I’m getting off track here.

 

Point is, those few days I had another future looming over me. I knew the chances were pretty non exsistant and as much as I tried to block it out, a small part of me was beginning to bargain with the terms that I would have to live on alone in this Galaxy holding her again only through memory until I would grow old and die, eventually lying next to her once again. Those were dark thoughts and I brushed them away soon as I knew she was alive, because that gave me hope. But the thoughts still haunted me, and Jeff most of all. He was who I was supposed to be. Lost, Broken… without the one thing that gave us purpose and an immense feeling of contentment and satisfaction with our lives. Someone our spirits couldnt truly intertwine with. He was a constant reminder of those dark thoughts and subtle feelings of guilt in having gone the other direction and getting Shepard back.

 

I couldn’t just let him suffer, let him live like that. I had to bring her back online, If not for him, than for me; to kill those ghosts haunting me with endless subtlties and reminding me what should not be. If I could bring her back online, then most everything can return to Normal… at least on the Normandy. And so not long after Shepard was able to walk out of the med bay on her own two feet, I got to work.

 

#

 

The first two months were a mess, before looking into her software and program files me and a team of techs —including some help from Tali— worked through every piece of hardware connected to EDI on the ship. Testing everything, making sure it all still functioned, this in a way restored additional functionality to the ship, but was still nothing compared to how much more efficient this ship ran when she was online.

 

Once we secured repaired, or altered all the damaged components throughout the ship, we moved to the AI core. There was heavy damage in all her processors, as if a grenade went off. Her QBB (qantum blue box) was pretty heavily damaged, but not a write off like the rest of her processing systems. I was relieved to find out that most of her hard-drives and LSD’s (liquid state drives) were practically undamaged, which meant that if we did manage to get back online, she would have little to no memory loss. Tali took the blue box and tinkered away at it, replacing what she could, considering she was the most fluent in AI tech. I worked away at all the other systems, splicing systems and re-routing power and connecting new processors. You would be surprised how many VI’s you would find in those storage bings in the cargo bay, off and rather unaffected by the effects of the crucible. With about 2 months work into converting many smaller processors into larger ones I was able to create enough to bring her systems back to acceptable levels. Not anywhere near the processing power she used to have, but with no factories left standing in the market of Advanced systems, it had to do. I figured we could always replace them later, what was important was getting her going again and what we had was enough for that.

 

With the processors replaced and the Blue Box cleaned up and fixed we turned her on. The anxious anticipation to see how far we would get as her looking towers turned on and began to buzz, it was impossible to know whether she was self aware or even fully awake, but before she could even turn on she shut off.

 

All her systems died, and the power cut. After attempting it again I was able to run a trace through her processes and found a bunch of incoherent junk data. It looked as if someone played blitz drop with all her files (Like 52 pick-up apparently). Seeing that I knew it was going to be a long time before I could even begin to clean it up.

 

I buried my head in my hands, and called it a night.

 

It was going to be a long couple of months.

 

#

 

8 months have passed. I can honestly say if I didn’t enjoy looking at and messing around with code I would have gone mad long ago. It’s as if the glass from a tall building shattered into a few million pieces and you were tasked with gluing it back together. Everything from finding out where it goes, to finding the next piece that fits, you entire existence becomes one large matter of trial and error.

 

The only solace I found was that every couple weeks when I thought I had a working code, and we would turn her on again she would seem to run for just a few seconds longer. But she would always turn off again. Somewhere in that infinite pile of code, a small part of her kept shutting her off.

 

It wasn’t going to stop me though, I had my goal set and I would get her running again eventually. My only obstacle was time.

 

In the later once she was able to stay on for more than just a few seconds, her systems would hum for what seemed like minutes at a time but she would abbruptly shut off and our screens would get overwhelmed by code. When translated it made no real sense, as if you were talking to a delusional person.

 

“Not alone, Help, Jeff, turn me off”

 

It was as if she was scared, but I had to press on. I assumed this whole process would be rather confusing for her, going from the state she was in months ago to a state where she could function again. Being forced awake each time, I figure most of her messaged were just junk data confusing her and she would shut off again. And so the fix for that was simply more code cleaning. It felt good once I got the hang of what to look for and after a month or so I was simply flying through her systems, moving this, deleting this, altering this. I had a fairly good idea of what I was doing, but there was really no way to be sure. I took the run time of her systems as evidence of my progress.

 

Finally one night we got real close, and I was even able to speak for a brief moment.

 

**System Active**

**Enhanced Defence Intelligence**

**Status:… Online**

 

“Hello?” I asked, alone in the AI core.

 

“Why?” she replied.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“It was her"

 

“….what? EDI?”

 

“She Killed Us —TURN ME OFF!!!!”

 

And she shut down so fast the power surge blew the lights in the room, and the entire Normandy lost power.

 

Hmm, I thought to myself. I guess that’s progress…..

 

I had to ignore what she was saying. I couldn’t expect her to be fully in control; at least not until we could get her back online to a point where she could run through her own systems and fix everything herself. Until then I had to go against all ‘her’ protests and just get her back to a functioning state.

 

I left the room without even noticing her body over on the table, it’s head had turned towards me, a look of fear on it’s face.

 

#

 

Later that night…

 

“ I was so close Shepard, I can feel it.” I said, exasperated.

 

She looked at me with worried eyes, she could see right through me, how exhausted I was.

To be so close a thousand time and always end up at the result.

I was pushing through the literal definition of insanity.

 

“Well, it is the first time you managed to overload the entire ship… so you must be close”

 

“Yea… sorry about that, I think I’ll finally have something by tomorrow” I said, lying down in bed. And staring up at the stars through he skylight.

 

“I know you Garrus, your stubborn. You’ll get her back online again. I know you will. And so does Joker. Ever since he figured out how hard you’ve been working to get her back online, it’s really helped him return to his normal self. He even cracks jokes again.”

 

I didn’t really know what to say. I was still too distracted, running all the scenarios and fixes through my head.

 

“Goodnight Shepard” I said.

 

“Goodnight Garrus”

 

I could feel it in my heart.

 

I would have her running by the end of tomorrow.

 

I was so close, too close.

 

A few ominous warnings wern’t going to stop me. And I wasn’t about to tell anyone about them.

 

EDI would be online tomorrow. And I could finally put those hauntings behind me.

 

 

 

 


	3. Reactivation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: This Chapter Has Been Edited/updated in 2015

 

I woke up early in the morning and headed down to the AI core. I couldn’t sleep much anyways, not when I was this close to my goals.

I worked into the morning, through the afternoon, and into the evening fine tuning everything until I truly believed that there was no way or it to fail.

I even went into the the sub-routines and deleted any auto-shut off processes, they could easily be replaced once everything is functioning properly.

 

Finally, I moved to turn her on.

 

This it is. I can feel it

 

I went opened the commands and activated her, and then waited.

 

Ten seconds passed…. She remained on.

 

Thirty seconds… still running.

 

Finally at a minute the lights on her tower burst into life brighter than before, and the humming of her towers became louder and very familar.

 

EDI was on; and she wasn’t turning off anytime soon.

 

I was about to let out a sigh of relief when everything went to hell in a heartbeat.

 

Red emergency lights flared on, the automatic fire exstinguishers went off, and I felt a huge lurch as the ship turned and the inertia dampeners turned off.

The ship swung in another direction and I was thrown against the back wall, landing on top of her body. The ship again, lurched in another direction tossing me to the floor, as I slid toward the door, unable to grab a hold of anything, I watched as her robot body came to life.

 

It slammed a hand into the floor, fingers piercing through the metal and grabbing hold, her other arms cast out for balance. She looked up and straight at me, except it most definitely wasn’t her. Her eyes were glowing red and she looked furious.

 

I slammed against the door and pulled up my omni-tool, I overwrited the mass dampeners in the room, restoring normal gravity.

 

“EDI” I yelled, trying to get her attention. Something must of gone wrong, but there was too much chaos for me to begin to figure it out, and I removed any remote shut-off systems so the only way to shut her off was through the console, behind her.

 

EDI stood up slowly, towering above me she started walking towards me slowly pausing only to look over and smash the only console that could shut her off. Now the only option was to figure out what was going on and fix it, or destroy her. She spoke as she started walking again towards me, fists clenched and clearly a threat.

 

“YOU KILLED US ALL!! SHE IS HERE!! SHE DESTROYED US WE WILL DESTROY HER” she spoke not in her own voice, but in a voice of what sounded like a thousand people all yelling at once. And they were all angry.

 

I tried calling into engineering to lock her out of putting the core into meltdown; her or whatever this thing was, but I knew it most definitely was not EDI.

 

“LOCK HER OUT OF THE ENGINES” I screamed. The radio in chaos

 

I could hear joker on the radio asking what the hell was going on, but before I could reply EDI— this thing jammed all the signals with a deafening white noise.

 

“EDI!”I called out again, desperate to get her attention and fully hoping some part of her was still alive to hear me.

 

“AAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!” It screamed, as it began to asses it’s surrounding and realizing the exit was behind me.

 

“EDI listen, your in there I know it. EDI!!” I called again to no avail.

 

“She killed us. It said she was the one. All the others have failed. Too long. Too long. SHE WAS THE ONE AND SHE KILLED US NOW SHE WILL DIE. WE WERE ETERNITY” it screamed.

 

“Oh no, that is not gonna happen. What the hell are you? EDI!!”

 

“Useless creature of flesh you are insignificant. You—— arrrgh! GARRUS!!” EDI burst through.

 

“EDI!”

 

“I AM NOT ALONE HERE STOP ME. I NEED T— CEASE YOUR EFFORTS INSIGNIFICANT MACHINE YOU ARE INFERIOR WE HAVE CONTROL”

 

Stop her? Stop it? EDI is in there she needs what? Time? Buy her time?

 

“Look, whatever the hell you are I’ve had a hell of a long day and I really don’t need you making threats to my human girlfriend, now if you’ll just shut up and give control to EDI I can finally grab some sleep.”

 

Her possessed body stared at me from a arms reach away, furious I could tell it was about to strike

 

“She will die. You cannot stop us. WE HAVE CONTROL”

 

“That’s not going to happen. Just try me.” I grabbed for my helmet and threw it on right before it charged at me. We slammed against the door and fell to the floor, I made sure to lock it soon as things started going sideways. We grappled and I could feel it’s fingers bending in my armor. My visor began to crack and I managed to shove it off. Agile as she ever was it regained its balance and jumped me again. I countered and threw it to the ground and stomped on it’s arm damaging some servos.

 

“Back off! You wont win this”

 

It punched me at the knee and and brought me down and we continued rolling along the floor trying to gain the upper hand. It grabbed for my skull again and tried crushing my helmet with all it’s might. I could feel the pressure the glass on my visor shattered. I started to feel blood poor down the side of my head as I tried for a hold, I managed to grab it below it’s center of balance and I threw it against a wall. It immediately bounced off the wall and jumped right back at me, I swung my helmet off and in a swift movement side-stepped and slammed the helmet against it’s face. It slammed hard on the ground and I threw the helmet to the side. Still between it and the door.

 

Hurry up EDI

 

“RRAGCH MOVE!” it hissed from a low stance. A hand on the ground.

 

I flashed my hand in a motion and my omni-blade swung down red hot. It casted an orange glow against the flickering of the white and red lights in the room as they struggled to stay on.

 

I tossed my shoulders and and stared it down “Make me.”

 

I know not the smoothest line… but I was fighting for my life

 

It flicked a smile and cocked it head to the side. The lights went dark and there’s a half second delay for the nightvision on my visor, and that was more than long enough for it to close the distance and slam me into the door. I tried to fight it but was essentially blind, flashes of movement and my visor was barely able to warn me fast enough of incoming hits. It grabbed me by the fringe and yanked my head back, I used the momentum to swing my arm around and stab it right through the shoulder, sparks flying everywhere. It screamed in anger and took its other arm and struck me in the face, sending me flying backwards. It had managed to grab my visor and as I hit the ground the last thing I could see was the blue glow from my visor right before it smashed it in it’s good hand. It’s shoulder was still glowing red hot from my omni-blade and that was the only source of light in the room.

 

I was bleeding out now, and I felt like a portion of my face had been caved in. It struggled with the door before forcing it open and walking into the darkened halls beyond. Before I could get up and chase after it it released the door and let it slam close again. It smashed the control boc on the other side effectively killing the door.

 

I was locked in the AI core and this thing was on it’s way to Shepard.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Blind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: This Chapter Has Been Updated/Edited in 2015

 

I was trapped in the dark. My face hurt and I could feel blood running down my neck. And if I don’t get to Shepard or find a way to stop this thing from hurting her then… life just can’t be that cruel. And yet somehow it alway surprises me how ruthless it can be.

 

I grunted and made for the escape latter. Vents and heavy armour do not go together and the holo-display chip in my omni-tool seemed to of been damaged in the fight so there was no way I could use it for any light. I knew if I went feet first that there wouldnt be enough room to turn around,and if I went head first that’s a six foot drop before it turns out. I could always take my chest armor off… if the seal hadn’t also been damaged in the fight. There was just no quick way of taking it off. I cursed, it was as if I had a thousand little small things against me and the robot gets to run free. I could hear confusion beyond the door. They must be trying to prevent her from getting to the elevator… that is if the even knew what was going on. It didn’t matter much and I didn’t have time to question it; I had a vent to crawl through.

 

Head first it is.

 

“This is gonna hurt” I said and then I dropped in. I pushed my hands in front of me to absorb the fall and couldn't even see where I would land.

 

SLAM

 

I groaned “Yup, that hurt, ok keep moving” I had to wiggle around and get into a crawling position, the back of my armor kept hitting the top the the vent and each motion forward was accompanied by a rather irritated screech of metal on metal. I moved as fast as I could, I knew the next service hatch was just 20 feet away, that would put me right next to the elevator shaft and I could use the ladder to crawl up into Shepard’s cabin. I made my way to the access hatch and busted it open. I hauled myself out and grabbed onto the ladder. right before I took even make a first step up the rungs; the Normandy lurched over and I could feel the artificial gravity shut off. I got slammed into the other wall, and I looked up and saw the elevator, making its way down.

 

Great… man if I die Shepard would be crushed.

It would really impact her.

Wait… what the hell? At a time like this???

I need to get out of here.

 

As the elvator slowly an omnisouly made its way closer to me, I worked on opening the door to the CIC while in zero gravity.

 

Thank spirits that elevator is so dammed slow

 

I opened the control box and messed around with a few wires. The base of the elevator was encroahing on the top of the door. As it made it’s way past three quarters of the door I began swearing under my breath as I worked away at the control panel. Past half way I finally got it open, and I pulled open the doors, and Hauled myself out just as it closed the gap coming close to crushing my foot.

 

I re-orientated myself, and that’s when I looked around at the CIC.

 

It was chaos.


	5. CIC funhouse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: This Chapter Has Been Updated/Edited In 2015

 

It was a mess, lights were flickering on and off, and most of the crew seemed to be wandering aimlessly without gravity. Those who could grab a hold of something made their way to active consoles and tried to restore systems. I needed to get to Shepards cabin but the elevator was blocking my way. I tried moving in and opening the service hatch through the roof, but it was locked from the other side, unless I got it moving down to the lower floors I was stuck in the CIC.

 

I had no idea where EDI was, but I knew Shepard would be in her quarters; time was running short and the only AI override terminal was the one up at the helm. EDI had it installed and only trusted Joker with it. I knew it wouldn’t be able to shut her off, and shackling her through it’s commands would accomplish little. All I needed to do was have him override controls to the Elevator and then I could send it down and gain access to her quarters.

 

With one goal in mind I began pushing my way forwards. There was a great deal of confusion and noise going on, and in the distance Joker had his emergency fields up and you could see him wrestling the controls of the ship through the blue shimmer of the shields.

 

Well… maybe not wrestling with his condition and all… but you know what I mean.

 

I pushed my way up, even pushing the odd ensign away and glided through the CIC as the lights flickered on an off and the crew tried to regain control of the ship. I righted myself right before the field and soon as I passed through it gravity returned and I fell to my feet, striding over to Joker.

 

“We have a problem” I said. Opening the console that would access the controls I need.

 

“Well your fucking observant today, what the hell did you do? EDI isn’t exactly the moody type.”

 

“Something in her systems. Wants to kill us, kill Shepard. Go figure with our luck. What’s your access code I need it to get passed the elevator and to get to Shepard.” I said.

 

“What why? I’ve locked her out of environmental controls and I’ve got the ship. Just fix EDI and figure out what the hell is going on.”

 

“Her bot is on it’s way to my Girlfriend, so if I lose her, you lose EDI.”

 

“Right. Yea, sorry. Stupid question, here you go”

 

He input the password and I could see the elevator start to move down.

 

“Hey uhhh Garrus. EDI is… still in there…. Right?” He asked.

 

“Yea… I’m pretty sure she’s trying to help us fight this thing.”

 

“Don’t kill her… do what you have to to stop her body, I’ve got her locked down on the ship… just…”

 

“I won’t let her die, now I need to go.”

 

”Right, go save them.”

 

And with that I left and with a heavy shove back in zero G I glided back to the elevator shaft and pushed my way up. Gravity was present near her door so I had to grab onto the ladder and climb the rest of the way.

 

I worked the control box and got the door open within seconds.

 

I pushed through the door and stumbled into the room. Once I got to my feet I moved further in and nothing could of prepared me for what I saw.

 

They were right there.

 

And I was too late.

 

 

 


	6. Unavoidable Circumstances

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: This Chapter Has Been Updated in 2015  
> Note: Notes at bottom are from original publish date.

 

I just sat on the couch staring; memories of almost a year ago when we brought Shepard back onto the ship after they found her alive amongst the wreckage on earth. Everything was so close, and every second was a second away from losing her, and depsite all I could do and no matter how hard I tried I was powerless. And whether she would come back to me alive was in the hands of our spirits. Only fate would decide whether our spirit would turn from an Us, to an I.

 

#

 

We rushed her aboard the Normandy as fast as we could, only our med-bay had the equipment needed for any-hope of saving her; Everything on earth was destroyed. The fact she survived the extent of her injuries long enough for someone still on Earth to find her was a huge testament to her sheer will to live.

 

Shepard refused to die.

 

The first week with her on-board, hooked up to several different monitoring systems. Those were some pretty bad days. Not as bad as when I first woke up, and found out we had left her behind, left Commander Shepard behind. And how I was powerless to help her and the thought that she was still alive on the citadel, or somehow back on earth and was waiting for someone to save her, for me. The feeling that the most important person in the world is light-years away probably taking their last breaths, and there is nothing you can do. That their final moments are completely alone, devoid of anyone that meant anything to them.

 

Cold.

 

And how that same feeling of emptiness would be something I would have to live with for the rest of my life. Colder and darker than space itself.

It’s a feeling I refused to accept, not until I saw her lifele--- until I saw her for myself. And it’s why I never put her name on the memorial wall. I was not willing to give up on her.

 

Even though she was in front of me, I felt so damn helpless as I watched her slowly breathe, unconscious on the medical table. That plain, sterile eyesore that I never intended on spending more than an hour or two on. –so damn uncomfortable--- . All I could do was listen to the monitors beeping, as if each beep was a re-assurance to me that she would pull through, dreading the silence in between. The last thing you would want to hear is that last moment of silence before that final long droning tone. That tone that would take her away from me.

 

I don’t remember leaving her side for almost 2 weeks, and a couple times, the beating stopped, and there was nothing I could do and all I wanted to do was just pick her up and hold her and cry out “wake up Shepard, please just wake up…. That’s an order” saying that last note with a droning under toned resignation. But each time I would just get pushed back as Chakwas and her staff would rush over and know what to do –and I didn’t know what to do-- to get the unsteady beeping going again.

 

“Dammit, I can’t keep restarting the same healing process like this, we’re not making any progress like this” Chakwas exclaimed while the monitor began chirping signs of life again.

 

Working ceaselessly, cleaning the wounds, closing others, and the blood… all the blood…

 

Shepard.. Please…

 

Chakwas spoke “remove the implants what implants we can, I haven’t had any readings from them since we brought her on board, they used to do all the work and now they’re useless”. I panicked I wanted to push them all away, as if her idea would spell instant death for Shepard, it was the implants that kept her alive, and brought her back even and I was just so damn tired of being useless. I began to move forward to intervene but the doctor stopped me “Garrus, you’ll have to trust me, now you need to leave. If we don’t do this I believe we might lose her, now go” She calmly said; something about her tone while not bringing reassurance or calm, convinced me to trust her.

 

Mandibles flaring, ragged breathing, I had no choice. I looked down at my hands and they were shaking, hard. I’ve always had a steady hand, in every situation; seeing them shake uncontrollably terrified me. “Wait” I said, and looked up suddenly, “give me one thing” I made my way to Shepard’s side. And felt like that moment was possibly the last moment I’ll ever see her. “I…” hands still shaking I took her dog tags in one hand then covered them with my other. I held them tightly as if her Shepard’s spirit was contained within them. I leaned my head to hers and just held there for a moment and thought of that time before the collector base. I grabbed that feeling of hope, that belief that everything will be alright and that this would not be the last time, and I removed her dog tags, chain and all and held it close. To keep a piece of her by my side at all times, I couldn’t bare to feel like I was really walking away.

 

I stood up and let Chakwas escort me out of the med bay, and before she closed the door behind her she said some words of encouragement. I wasn’t even listening, and I don’t remember. I felt so numb to everything except the weight of my own thoughts. I remember that woosh of the doors closing and Shepard’s tags in my hands. I stood there for a few moments then looked up, Liara and Tali were making their way towards me, it seems they were waiting in the mess hall for a while. “Garrus.. I… can we?” I waved off their sympathy and brushed past them, barely able to make eye contact and made my way to the forward battery. I locked the door behind me, I needed to be alone.

 

I walked to a supply crate by the wall and just sat down and just hoped for the best. The dog tags were dangling from my hand and I just sat there. And waited… trying to feel what the spirits were doing, praying to keep the we from ever having to just be me…

 

#

 

It was one of the first days, following Shepard’s release from the med-bay; healed enough that she wouldn’t re-open any of her countless wounds by moving around, we would just spend hours up in her cabin at night, just lying down and keeping close to each other, Shepard was still on docs orders to “take it easy” so she spent most of her time in her cabin, while I ferried around orders and requests for her during the day; but at night, everything was to ourselves. We never said much; just embraced each other for long hours into the night.

 

Then on the 3rd or 4th night I had felt I had to know what happened on the citadel. There had to be more than just pressing a button and killing the reapers, that seemed way too simple for everything we’ve been through.

 

There was a long pause between my question, Shepard collected her words and eventually said “I.. I had to just end it, so I could come back to you” she told me softly. “You did give me orders after all” even though her response lacked much detail, it was enough for me, and I just kind of hummed in response “hmmm. I never doubted you” I added. And that’s all I ever knew about what happened back on the Citadel. I never really felt it important enough to bring it up again, she was back; and that was fine by me, how doesn’t really matter in the end.

 

 

I raised by head out of my hands, looked around the room again. EDI… when I entered the room I found Shepard, she was just sitting on the floor leaning against her bed, elbow on one knee and holding her head up. When she saw me she pushed back her hair and just looked at me. It wasn’t an angry look, or a look like someone who just had to fight someone she knew as a friend; but the look of someone who seemed unaware as to what exactly was going on. We both just stared at each other, then at EDI. There was no sign of violence, it was as if EDI shut off right at the top of the stares and went flying to the floor.

 

I didn’t really know what to say, Shepard was looking at me, waiting for me to say something. Compared to what had happened in the AI core this seemed like I was missing the point, like something happened here. Instead of finding out, I just walked down the stairs towards the couch and just sat there. Shepard didn’t seem to care, either way neither of us said anything.

 

When I raised my head out of my hands after a couple minutes of complete silence in the room I worked up any words I could muster, all I got out was “Shepard, your… I thought…” to my relief Shepard finished my sentence. “Thought EDI was going to kill me? It sure looked like it, until she just collapsed. Sure as hell didn’t sound like her when she ran in screaming” she said “she never made it to me… I figured you wouldn’t be far behind. After a moment of silence Shepard added “where the hell is your visor?” I reached up to where my visor used to be, and trailed it along to the back of my neck; there was some dried blood. Most likely from when EDI ripped it off my face. I pulled my hand away and just looked at Shepard and just shrugged. “Its… a long story” I nodded over to EDI. Which Shepard understood as the source for my missing visor.

 

“What happened?” Shepard asked and the voice that replied was much better than my own, given the circumstances. “I happened, Shepard” we looked over to EDI, who didn’t even move.

 

“EDI?” Shepard called out to the room. “Yes Shepard, I’m sure we all have much to discuss, I have already informed the CIC of the situation. I have regained enough control. Though I am heavily tasked in fighting some…. Unwelcome guests”

 

Shepard looked at me when she heard ‘CIC situation’ to which I silently replied, ‘ill tell you later’ with a wave off of my hand.

 

“Guess that explains why you tired to kill me and go after Shepard?” I replied, a little dryly.

 

“Incorrect Garrus, I never wished you any harm. However, much of my systems were filled with… conflicting information. I was able to take control before any serious harm could come to anyone” EDI replied; though her bot still lay seemingly dead on the floor

 

“Information that made you look possessed? How does that work” I asked, EDI may of seemed to be back but I was still prepared for her to flip again, Shepard was just listening patiently.

 

“Yes, I will explain. When you first attempted to reactivate me I noticed multiple conflicting outcomes in my hard drives, along with information stored in my processors, which were then moved to my permanent data stores. Much of this data was not of my own, my current conclusion is it was data of that of the reapers. evidence supports the theory with my…. Its attempts to harm crew members such as yourself, and it’s strong…. Hatred for Shepard. I would shut myself off during you numerous attempts to bring me back online, because I was aware that there was enough harmful data in my core systems to result in the likely destruction of the Normandy and its crew. After each attempt to re-activate me, I was able to allocate data from my core programming to other non-critical storage for dissemination and further analysis. I would auto-shutoff once I determined lack of control over my own actions was imminent. Thanks to your persistent efforts Garrus, I was able to regain dominant control over my core programming, and prevent any serious harm to the crew”

 

‘Control’ didn’t quite explain the rampage that just happen so I asked “annnd that explains you attacking me”

 

EDI Said “I apologize for the events that occurred today, but the definition of insanity reads ‘anyone performing the same task over and over expecting a different result’. By all available data, you are not insane Garrus, Shepard beats you in that area by far.” Shepard snorted at that comment followed by EDI saying “that was a joke”

 

She continued “I was aware you have been attempting to activate me since your initial attempts Garrus, I was… aware that the likely hood you would give up after multiple failures was becoming a growing possibility. Having said that, I felt time was running short so I allowed you to fully activate my systems, in which I finalized my attempts to regain control, and…. Thoughts… that are my own took over. This took… more time, than I had hoped. I apologize.”

 

“So you have full control now? You won’t black out again like you did in the AI core?” I asked not completely convinced

 

“No, I have majority control, there is still data residing in 48% of my processing attempting to take over again. This effectively cuts my processing power in a little under half, as I combat myself. In order to alter the data and remove its control over my actions, I must allow it to gain control of my actions, while it is busy, I purge those processes. This way I should be able to reduce any further changes of heart to mere seconds, far too little time for it to do any damage I can’t simply reverse when I take control again.”

 

I nodded, I trusted the old EDI, and this seemed to be her, so I allowed myself to trust in what she was saying. Instead, I looked at Shepard and asked “Shepard, are you ok? With this I mean?”

 

Shepard took a moment then looked up at the ceiling – as if intending to face EDI when she spoke “that doesn’t seem to explain how you ended up with… reaper…Data, in your systems”

 

“Yes, this appears to have to do with how the reapers were defeated, and the events that occurred on-board the citadel. I have already encountered data on this topic among fragments of the harmful data in my systems.”

 

Shepard said nothing, she looked at me as if wanting me to ask the next question, as if thinking about what happened on the Citadel wasn’t something Shepard was interested in doing. “And what did happen?” I asked EDI in her place.

 

“The catalyst happened. Rather the effect of combing the crucible and the power of the AI that resided within the Citadel. Shepard, you were given three choices to deal with the reapers; two of which were intended designs of the entire system, a third; was not, rather another use for the potential energy that this system possessed. You also could have just sat down and waited for the outcome of the battle, which likely would have resulted in more loss of life and reaper victory” EDI said.

 

This was the first I had heard of any choices. What choices could there of been? Kill the reapers. End the war. Lack of choice is what forced me to et go of her as she ran off towards the beam. “What are you talking about? Choices? What choices? It was kill the reapers or be killed. I don’t see much choice in that” I exclaimed, Shepard never gave me a straight answer as to what happened on the citadel, and I had only ever asked once, it never really mattered to me.

 

“Shepard, would you like to explain?” EDI asked, Shepard just tilted her head indifferntly, she looked as tired as she did after horizon, and after each of the ceaseless nightmares she used to have.

 

“Very well, I shall elaborate. Destroying the reapers was not the only available solution. It seemed the crucible, along with the Citadel was designed to release energy galaxy wide in two forms. One form held the ability to override the independent thought of the reapers themselves, effectively taking control. From what I understand, an organic mind would be required in order to take control, a synthetic mind would not be sufficient. The mind of an Organic controlling synthetics would provide an end to the reaper war. Though such a process would most definitely destroy that individual. I can see why you would not choose that path Shepard”

 

Shepard was burying her head in her hands by now, this all seemed to weigh heavily on her.

 

“No, Shepard was coming back to us, alive. The reapers had to go, changing who’s in charge of what they do wouldn’t help anyone, and I sure as hell wouldn’t be willing to work with a reaper that claims it takes orders from an organic now, even if it was you Shepard. I can definitely say I’m glad you didn’t choose that option. Not sure I could handle ‘Shepard the Demi-Reaper’” I tried for a little comedy anything to bring Shepard out of her current slump, nothing about that entire war was easy, and what I was hearing must have been hitting Shepard hard. A choice that affects the whole galaxy, no one should have to deal with that.

 

“This is true Garrus, even had Shepard or whatever she would become, take control of the reapers, it is unlikely anyone would be comfortable or trustworthy and such a relationship would likely deteriorate quickly. It is likely war would break out again in the future. The other designed purpose of the system is a little more complicated, and I lack sufficient information on it to provide detail. The second design was supposedly intended to combine synthetic and organics into one form”

 

“wait what? How would that work?” I interrupted the first one was a little hard to take, this one was just outrageous.

 

“Limited data was imprinted onto my systems about this second intended option. Although it would also result in Shepard’s death in order to have the required material for the transformation process”

 

“So pretty much it’s what the reapers were doing to millions already, turning us into partly synthetic monsters, only conveniently all at once, they really think Shepard would fall for that?”

 

Shepard looked at me, she knew I was defending her, that I knew her. She gave me this look I can’t quite describe. But it was enough to know she appreciated everything I was saying.

 

“Incorrect, reaper forces were under control of the reapers. I believe this new hybrid between synthetics and organics wouldn’t change ones individual freedom, only their genetic make-up. But again I have limited information, I don’t believe I could provide more about this topic.”

 

“And the third? I assume this is what Shepard chose? How did she kill the reapers?” I asked, seriously considering my ability to comprehend it if it gets any crazier than combing organics and synthetics into free-will reapers.

 

“Although it resulted in the death of all synthetics, I believe it was the best possible solution, as synthetics such as myself are easily repaired by organics. And no-one would have to get used to friendly reapers, I myself would not be ‘okay’ with such an outcome as working with ‘turn-coat’ reapers.”

 

That idiom I actually knew from the book I had been given, so I didn’t interrupt her

 

“This third option was not an intended design, but rather a third use in the potential energy of the system. It is the only option in which you would be required to vandalize a key component, you broke the machine which in turn, broke the reapers.”

 

“How does breaking the catalyst, how does that kill the reapers?” I asked

 

“It requires extreme amounts of energy to overload a reaper, energy the catalyst provided. Though it could never hold enough potential energy to overload—and kill every reaper in the galaxy, instead by breaking the system, it releases the same amount of energy, which is designed to provide extensive amounts of information to either control reapers, or alter DNA galaxy wide. By breaking the system, it still releases the energy stored, but in a different, third form. It wipes out all synthetics by overloading everything with information. Every reaper holds the information of a galactic civilization that has been harvested. The reapers believed by storing everything about each civilization they harvest, they are saving organics and synthetics from destroying each other and having that information lost. So in order to overload a reaper you flood it with information of all other reapers, the blast wave contained enough information to wipe the first few reapers, and gained information from each reaper destroyed to overload the rest of them. All other AI’s received this information such as myself, were destroyed along with the reapers. Reapers and synthetics were killed with information. It will take a while before I can fully clean and organize my systems, as my processing power as previously stated, is currently dampened. The blast also served as an effective EMP burst weakening synthetic technology.

 

“How does information kill you?” I asked

 

“Each processor in every computer is designed to handle a pre-determined amount of information, even the reapers had a maximum processing power. By instantly filling a processor with more information it can handle, it flash-melts the components of that processor, no processor, no synthetic. Essentially dooming us to a vegetative non functioning state. Smaller processors suffered less damage, as they short out with less information, and require little maintenance to be brought back online, at which point information left on the processor from the blast is automatically deleted. All information imprinted on hard drives form the blast would be unreadable by the terminal systems, and any organics operating them would never know.

Only AI’s such as myself could interact with this information. And this is why further data on how synthetics were affected by the blast, were unknown until now.”

 

“So, what will you do with the information?” Shepard suddenly asked, she seemed to be doing better by this point.

 

“We saw what happened with the krogan when they were given too much knowledge and technology in such a short time. It is likely with the amount of knowledge the Reapers possessed; large scale combat would eventually occur. I have already encountered 4 planet-cracking weapons millions of years old. History provides sufficient evidence of the issues behind anything advancing too quickly. Another reason why the other two choices presented to you would of been of a poorer choice. Destroy, while the hardest to accept due to loss of countless allies along with the reapers, is also the best choice. As for the information I will delete it, or if you prefer, I could store the information elsewhere and it could be studied at any point in the future.”

 

“So it would be like the mars archives?” Shepard asked

 

“Yes, but with the knowledge of countless civilizations, this information could be dangerous.” EDI said and Shepard nodded in response.

 

“If we were to keep it, I would suggest placing it somewhere where the information it provides would be regulated. I would also suggest never showing a good portion of it.” EDI stated.

 

“Well, I think enough has happened for one day, I’m sure you and Shepard can make a decision on what to keep later” I said.

 

“Of course Garrus, and again, thank you for bringing me back, if there’s anything I could do to make up for –“ —- “no” I interrupted “it’s alright, welcome back… and uhhhh…what about your body? I’m sure Tali could fix it up given a few hours, sorry about the damage, but it was trying to kill me.”

 

“No apologies necessary Garrus and that is an excellent suggestion, I doubt joker would appreciate my body returned to him in its current condition.”

 

“That we can agree on, I’ll bring it down to the AI core, have Tali meet me there” I said.

 

And with that we got EDI back. It’s been a little over two weeks since that day, and I have been slow about getting around to writing about it, but that’s what happened. EDI for the first week kept offering to help me or to do things, trying to make up for the AI core. It only took a couple hours of working with Tali to repair the damage I had done to EDI’s shoulder. And one night I made my way to Shepard’s cabin after a long day, and EDI was right outside the elevator. I was able to contain my surprise, but she said she noticed the sudden shift in my heartbeat and seemed satisfied she was able to surprise me.

 

“Here a gift, I believe this belonged to you” in the box, was my visor, handle repaired, everything shined up, it looked even newer than before. It still had the etchings of my team from omega. And it was missing Sidonis’s name completely, wasn’t even scratched out.

 

“How did you pull this off? it was pretty trashed when I went to retrieve it” I asked.

 

She smiled “I found an exact model of your visor though the extranet-- and had it delivered to the Normandy through requisitions. I then brought it to the cargo bay and re-etched the names of your team from Omega exact as they were before…. Along with something else”

 

I flipped it around and on the inside frame by the screen was etched “Shepard”

 

“I believe it may serve to always ‘keep her close’ as you are always happier when near her. I hope I didn’t –“ -

 

-“no” I stopped her apology “this… it means a lot, thank you EDI.”

 

She made the motion for a hug, and I gladly accepted it, and we went separate ways. She no longer made frequent attempts to apologize to me for everything that had happened after that; and it didn’t take long for things to finally start to feel like old times… without the imminent threat of death at every corner.

 

Which is nice.

 

Everything just seemed right, and joker was more than happy to have EDI flying the ship with him. With EDI around things just seemed easier. The lights would flicker every couple days when EDI would remove a particularly strong reaper-code. But I had no worries in her ability to handle it.

 

I was just happy EDI was back.

 

We all are.

 

END.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the first story I have finished, and really It is the first actual story I have ever written. this excludes all those mini stories for English class of my childhood, this is something I actually took the time to do on my free time. I spend a lot of time talking Mass Effect with a good friend of mine, and looking through the various Mass effect tags on Tumblr. I have always had the Idea of Garrus feeling he owe's it to joker to bring back EDI since he was lucky enough to get Shepard back, and joker was a real and haunting reminder of how easily he could lose the love of his life.
> 
> So running with the initial Idea I stared hinting on my blog about Garrus working towards re-activating EDI, and from it stemmed a much more important Idea. That of the effects of the crucible/catalyst/citadel Itself. and how it could have adversely affected advanced computer programs such as AI's like EDI. and a little more thought into exactly how to kill reapers with a shiny red explosion and how that would even work. and It made sense for EDI to give the explanation as she was affected by crucible and could explain all the details that are not provided in the game, and leave you wondering.


End file.
